« ROCKY BALBOA | Main | DREAMGIRLS »

December 21, 2006

CHARLOTT'S WEB

Welcome!

ColeSmithey.com

Groupthink doesn't live here, critical thought does. This ad-free website is dedicated to Agnès Varda and to Luis Buñuel. Punk heart still beating.

Get cool rewards when you click on the button to pledge your support through Patreon.

Thanks a lot acorns!

Your kind generosity keeps the reviews coming!

ColeSmithey.com

 

ColeSmithey.comSteve Buscemi's invigorating vocal characterization of Templeton the rat is the only high point in this sleep-inducing live action-animated revamp of the 1973 animated classic, based on E.B White's 1952 children's book.

The ever-insufferable Dakota Fanning plays Fern, the precocious little farm girl who saves the life of a runty pig she names Wilbur, who needs the exhaustive assistance of a kindly spider named Charlotte (voiced by Julia Roberts).

ColeSmithey.com

Wilbur needs to avoid hanging upside down in the smokehouse.

Everything about "Charlotte's Web" is a rote retelling of the story set in a vaguely '50s era Americana where nothing happens that doesn't revolve around farm animals.

ColeSmithey.com

Oops.

Director Gary Winick ("Tadpole") never varies the film's dirge-like rhythm as he walks through the plot like he's passing around a collection plate at a late night church service. 

No cash for you.    

Rated G. 96 mins.

2 Stars

Cozy Cole

ColeSmithey.com

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

Verify your Comment

Previewing your Comment

This is only a preview. Your comment has not yet been posted.

Working...
Your comment could not be posted. Error type:
Your comment has been saved. Comments are moderated and will not appear until approved by the author. Post another comment

The letters and numbers you entered did not match the image. Please try again.

As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.

Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.

Working...

Post a comment

Comments are moderated, and will not appear until the author has approved them.

Featured Video

SMART NEW MEDIA® Custom Videos

COLE SMITHEY’S MOVIE WEEK

COLE SMITHEY’S CLASSIC CINEMA

Throwback Thursday


Podcast Series